— UPDATE BELOW —
My brand new iPhone 7 is unable to connect to the AT&T cell network. With no local inventory available, and the Apple Care rep unable to fix the issue, I’m forced to send it back to Apple, paying shipping, and using up one of my two “instances of accidental damage” that are covered by the Apple Care protection plan. Needless to say, I’m a bit peeved. Definitely not the same “instant swap” experience that is being described in this MacRumors article: http://www.macrumors.com/2016/09/19/iphone-7-no-service-airplane-mode-issue/
UPDATE: After engaging the @AppleSupport twitter account, we’ve come to a resolution which will provide free replacement of the defective phone. With supplies limited, it might take a bit, but this outcome is much more palatable.